Posts Tagged ‘big fella’

Of a Cruise Ship Passenger

So, when at home my daily dietary habits include:


Porridge or cereal


Sandwich, maybe an omelet


In the hands of Mrs. Me, I’m afraid.

Obviously along the way there may be a few drinks involved, a couple of glasses of wine, a couple of glasses of whiskey and of course coffee / tea and yes, even water. And this, along with occasional biscuit, cake, crisps etc. does me quite adequately for any day of the week.

So why is it that as soon as I and, I suspect many other people, board a cruise ship, we throw caution to the wind; discard common sense ignore what one’s body is saying and devour anything on offer.

When on a cruise ship however my dietary habits change and might typically include:


Porridge (maybe), fried eggs, bacon, sausage(s), beans, tomatoes, mushrooms, fried bread, and [sometimes] black pudding, followed by toast and jam and a plate of fruit.


Fish & chips, or curry and chips, or pie and chips plus a chocolate desert and maybe some fruit and a pint of lager


Sandwiches (small and various) plus a small cake and a glass of Rosé


Large gin & tonic plus a bowl of nibbles and maybe another gin & tonic


Starter) Prawn Cocktail, Foie Gras or melon:

Main Course) Chicken or salmon or steak, with chips, maybe some peas;

Desert) whatever is on offer but normally includes cream / custard or, if I’m feeling a little too plump by this time of day, a sorbet. All accompanied by wine and liqueurs.

After Dinner Retire to see a show or listen to a band to enjoy a couple of glasses of wine / champagne / prosecco / and/or whiskey.

Obviously along the way there may be a few drinks involved, a couple of glasses of wine, a couple of glasses of whiskey and of course coffee / tea and yes, even water, but, no occasional biscuit, cake, crisps etc. I’m not a pig you know.

I have to admit, I did have a theory (see My Last Posting of the Cruise) that ‘one of the peculiarities of cruising, especially sea cruising is that the salt-water air has a tendency to reduce the elasticity of one’s clothing thus making them appear and feel so much tighter. I can think of no other explanation, save that of course of over eating, which I find hard to believe.’ – And to add insult to injury, even my feet need bigger shoes when I go cruising: How on earth does that happen?

And so, it’s back to MyFitnessPal. – just look for Podgethepuffer.

Must lose weight, must lose weight.


I only need one hand for counting now.

The number 5 is the symbol of the perfection in the Mayas.

The number 5 is apparently used to Symbolise the force and the limits of the man in his control on the Universe (!).

The number 5 is also the number of the life and the nature, according to Aeppli.

For His Podgeness, the number 5 really means:

5 more sleeps to go;
5 more sleeps to cruising;
5 more sleeps till the big fella gets on that boat,
with his bird and her boy;
5 more sleeps to cruising.

To add to the excitement, I’ve just realised there’s going to be firework displays as each ship sails out. What with the Red Arrows and the Princess Royal coming along to view me (she’s viewing everybody else as well I know but, permit me my dreams) I’m not sure how much more excitement I can take. I may just need a drink or two to calm me down. Actually, the Bombay Sapphire is looking quite enticing even now….

Do you know what, I think I’m starting to get quite emotional. Hmmm, must ‘man up’…

Wait: a horrible thought has just crossed my mind: after the cruise what will I do? No more countdowns 😦

Ah ha, no worries, after her indoors rescued me from the river recently, I apparently owe her a cruise. Possibly one in September. Yay. Another countdown could be on the cards. Better still, I think I may have conned her into paying.

Won’t be the same as the Grand Event though :-(.

The number 9 is seen as the number of the man, as a numeral symbol of his gestation (nine months).

The number 9 is the expression of “the power of the Holy Spirit”, according to Etchegoyen.

The freemasons have made the number 9 the eternal number of human immortality.

The number 9 number was considered as sacred in Egypt and in Greece.

To His Podgeness however, the Number 9 simply means:

9 more sleeps to go;
9 more sleeps to cruising;
9 more sleeps till the big fella gets on that boat,
with his bird and her boy;
9 more sleeps to cruising.

And after that 9th sleep, there shall be much rejoicing and coming together of all P&O’s l_u_v_e_r_l_y cruise ships and I, His Podgeness, will be one of the chosen ones who will be joining the historic celebrations, along of course with She Who Must be Obeyed. 😉 plus of course, many many others.

Today, I will be venturing into the loft / roof-space / attic, to retrieve the many cases and carriers that I just know we’ll need. As a minimum, I reckon we’ll need 2 full size suit cases, 2 medium size suitcases, 1 hard shell suit carrier, 2 ruck sacks, 2 (bulging at the seams) camera bags, and a couple of carry on bags (hand luggage). within these items there will be at least 7 hand bags with, each no doubt, matching shoe’s and of course some serious shopping bags with good strong handles. 😉

The preparations are now in full swing.

At the Mayas, the number 10 represents the end of a cycle and the beginning of another.

For Pythagoras, 10 was the symbol of the universe and it also expressed the whole of human knowledge.

For his Podgeness, 10 means:

10 more sleeps to go;
10 more sleeps to cruising;
10 more sleeps till the big fella gets on that boat,
with his bird and her boy;
10 more sleeps to cruising.

Blimey, I’m so excited I can hardly sleep.

Previously, I announced that I’d packed my wash bag. Well, I’ve now also packed all my drugs (prescribed) for the week + an extra day (you never know).

Now, get this, we’ve estimated the number of cases that we’ll need and have come to the conclusion that we’ll need to take two, yes that’s right, two cars. When Debbie and I finally retire, we WILL be going on a world cruise: just think of the number of suitcases we’ll need then 😉

For all those taking the Oceana out tomorrow (24th) down the Atlantic coast, I hope you have great trip (I wish I was with you all). But, please, please bring her back in one piece.